I was never a fat kid or a lazy kid.  I did not spend hours in front of the TV or the computer.  I did play outside and participated in all the neighborhood sporting games.  My life did not revolve around food. 

It was not until my second year of college that food became a big part of my life.  That was the year I met my now ex-husband.  The year was 1990 and so started my struggle journey to wellness.  My ex came from a family of big eaters.  In fact, he had been extremely overweight all through his childhood.  Ironically, he was not the picture of fitness, not necessarily healthy live though.  He exposed me to a variety of new cuisines and eating habits and I was lost in a world of delicious, rich foods.

I put on 15 pounds during the first year of our relationship, but that was nothing.  I had been grossly underweight and was not just in the perfect range for my 5′ 10″ frame.  Then another 15 the second year.  By the time we got married I was weighing in at 185 pounds.  Now I was getting worried, but not worried enough to do anything about it.  It wasn’t until, and this is embarrassing, I returned to my former job and they all asked me when I was due.  WHAT?  I was not pregnant.  Uh Oh.

In year 4 of our marriage I joined a weight loss program and dropped 25 pounds and was once again buying my clothes in regular sizes.  I was feeling pretty darn good about myself and then out of no where everything started to turn to shit.  Both of my grandmothers passed away within six months of each other, my husband and I separated and my job was a nightmare.  I slowly put the weight back on and then some.  My ex and I got back together for a while and I stared losing the weight again.  By my 30th birthday I was back to 170 pounds and looking pretty good if I do say so myself. 

Just like before, my world went crazy.  My husband announced he wanted a divorce and moved out the next month.  I soon found out that he and my friend were expecting a child.  This however, did not cause me to eat, it caused me to starve myself.  Nothing would stay down and I lost another 10 pounds getting back to my pre-struggle weight of 160.  Then I met Aaron, my current husband.  I was so happy and stopped feeling sick all the time.    We married and moved to Chicago.   The weight started creeping back and I was tired of the constant battle.  I tried to keep it off and eventually gave up and just ate the way I wanted.  I said that I would rather be fat and happy than skinny and in misery.

Fast forward to 2009.  On a Sunday night in March my father collapsed and died from sudden cardiac death.  He was just 62.  He was overweight and had suffered from heart related issues since his heart attack when he was 40, but the medications were working and he had not had any heart related issues in quite some time.  That was my wake up call.  My dad knew that being overweight and not eating a proper diet wasn’t helping him and it wasn’t until he had his knee replaced in late 2008 that he decided to make some changes.  That was my wake up call.  I didn’t want to carry around all that excess weight and end up with high blood pressure, bad knees, blah blah blah.  So in May of 2009 weighing 230 pounds I decided enough was enough and I stopped trying to find the best diet and started living healthy.  I decided to make a lifestyle change and not a quick fix.   So 20 years later, I began my new journey, my wellness journey and I’m happy to report that in the past 10 months I’ve dropped 40 pounds.  My cholesterol is back to normal and so is my blood pressure.  I look forward to every day and all the new ways I can find to live healthy and happy.  I hope you join me in my journey.



  1. jennifer said,

    April 12, 2010 at 7:20 pm

    congrats!!! It feels great to lose… i was at 265 this past summer. In Dec my husband and I decided to start eating healthy, going to the gym, etc. I’m presently at 232 and still losing! He was at 250 and is down to about 234 (he’s doing a lot of heavy weights so he’s gaining more muscle). Keep up the great work!!!!

  2. August 17, 2010 at 8:59 pm

    Wow you’ve had quite a journey. Good for you for keeping focus on getting healthy. I’m not sure if you do product reviews, but if you do, I’d like to recommend Kardea bars. They are low fat, low carb (and low glycemic), whole grain, natural, high protein, kosher and vegan, and (more importantly) are really delicious. They have a chewy texture with bits of crunch from oats and nuts. At 140 calories per bar, they’re nutrition packed and provide a lasting sense of fullness.

    If you would like to blog about Kardea, we’d be happy to send you a free sampler. Just send along your mailing address.


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